Relationships

I’m a 30-year-old woman in a relationship since 2008. I love him very much but lately I feel like we’re losing each other. We haven’t had sex in months! I don’t want us to wait too long to do something about this just to be nice and avoid hurting each other. How do I bring back the excitement into our relationship and light the fire again because it used to be amazing? Please help me because I don’t want to lose my best friend. – Spark is Fading

Dear Spark, Many couples feel that after years together their relationship is not as passionate. You are not alone. Some couples may not feel as appreciated by their partner or may even feel neglected. More often than not, resentment starts to build and couples begin to criticize even the smallest oversights of their partner, which threatens their friendship. What leads…

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Career Advice

I am 18 and looking for a career in counselling or psychology. Not sure which program to choose or which way to proceed. I’m from India and will graduate from high school this April. I want to know options in Canada in the field of counselling or neuro-psychology/behavior psychology program. Can you provide some assistance in the finding the best program? – New to Canada

Dear New, Yes, the road to becoming a counsellor may seem confusing and even daunting. It was for me as well, when I started my program over 27 years ago. I had many questions: Should I specialize or generalize? Should I treat adults (men, women, or both?), children, or families? Which approach or modality would I prefer, or be good…

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Family

I am a single mother, trying to raise my daughter with religious principles and values. It’s why I was shocked when I caught my four-year-old daughter playing with her genitals in the living room during a party at my house. I immediately chastised her in front of my guests and sent her to her room. I’m now feeling guilty for the way I reacted. Could I have done something else, and how can I fix this mess? – Motherhood Challenges

Dear Motherhood, As a therapist, I’m wondering what is the real issue here – do you have an issue with your daughter “playing with her genitals,” or do you have a problem with the fact that others saw her doing this? First of all, all children go through a time when they are curious about which parts of their body…

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Dear Dr. Faizal
Dear Dr. Faizal
Ethnic Diversity

My husband and I are in an interracial marriage. I’m Caucasian and he is South Asian. We have managed to work through our cultural differences but now that we are parents, our son seems to have trouble with his identity. Unlike his non-interracial friends, he feels like he does not fit in. To help our son feel complete, we feel that we should raise him in one culture so that he feels like he belongs in society. What do you think? – Life from Two Worlds

Dear Life, Congratulations on achieving a successful interracial marriage! As you and your husband have been able to navigate through the cultural differences and form a relationship, I feel confident that you should be able to help your child to also form an identity for himself. A sense of belonging, or the lack thereof, is a major issue for those…

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Dear Dr. Faizal
Self

As I grow older, I’m losing the happiness and excitement I once used to feel. Also, I hate feeling stressed out, ever! I have many good things going on in my life right now – great job, great girlfriend, etc. but I haven’t achieved any of the goals I had when I was younger. I used to be so carefree, light and optimistic. I don’t know why I can’t shake the feeling that maybe something is off? Maybe it’s because of the heartbreaks over the years? I just want to go back to the innocence I once had. – Happy

Dear Happy, It’s wonderful that you have good memories of your childhood. Most children are carefree – partly because they don’t have real responsibilities. But you must realize that you are now an adult – with all the responsibilities that come with adulthood. This is natural; we all must grow up. Resisting one’s maturity and wanting to reclaim one’s childhood…

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Dear Dr. Faizal
Career Advice

I am a Licensed Optician. I LOVE my career. I work at two Optometry clinics and founded a mobile service. I’m not ready to close my business but I am losing my confidence at it because my eyesight is failing by way of irreversible retinal degeneration. I am thinking positively and looking for new ways to run my business. I can still see but am losing the detailed vision I need to do my job independently. Should I close my business? – But I Love My Career

Dear But, It’s so wonderful to hear that you love your career. I presume that you have worked very hard for many years and are dedicated to the work you do. Such dedication sometimes leads us to believe that we will always continue to play the same role that we have appreciated for so long. Appreciation for one’s career can…

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Dear Dr. Faizal
Relationships

Valentine’s Day is the worst day of the year. As the only single person of friends, I’m always hearing about plans for this day and my social media feed explodes with gifts my friends have received. Every year on Feb 14, I sit at home and watch a horror movie by myself. I want to do something different this year. Something fun. Suggestions? – Hate Being Single on V-Day

Dear Hate, It’s true that some singles become a bit sad on Valentine’s Day because they believe it’s a day for couples and that only by being a part of a couple can they be happy. If you also share this perspective, there’s a few ways you could meet someone on this day. You could, as others have done before…

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